Clark Natural

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The spoof on the long running Mark Trail comic strip is probably a little too obscure, but I hope the joke works even if you don’t get the reference. I never read the daily version, but the Sunday comic was always one of my favorites, right behind Ripley’s.

I was shocked to learn that there are 2.6 million undecided voters in this country. According to the article, that’s a relatively low number compared to previous election years. It is very frightening that the outcome of the election depends on the voting equivalent of the O.J. jury.

I’m still not sure if the people who are willfully ignorant of even the most basic facts about the candidates aggravate me more than the people who think TV provides all the information they need. It’s a tight rope, and I’ve reconciled the issue by deciding that both groups are complete morons.

However, I don’t think everyone who votes Republican is a moron. The wealthy and those connected to big business should vote that way, it’s in their own personal financial interest. The idiots who believe a soul is created whenever two people fuck really don’t have any other options. And until the McFadden Voting Rights Only For Those Who Scored 1200 Or Higher On The SATs Act (AKA The Smarty Pants amendment) passes, they still get to vote.

I know the 5-yard chuck rule isn’t new. However, this is the first year the NFL is attempting to strictly enforce it. That’s too many words for an already crowded text box. I agree with Jeremy that it’s a dumb rule and has only been revived to placate the Indianapolis Colts’ delicate wide receivers who can’t even take a little bump n’ running from a superior Patriots squad.

I doubt any of them are reading this, but if you happen to be an undecided voter, I apologize for this week’s cartoon. Particularly for using big words like ‘ecosystem’ and ‘cognitive.’ If I inspired you to become less of an uninformed drain on our society, check out the Kerry Plan and the Bush Plan, and try to figure things out. If you’re in a hurry to catch the latest Fear Factor, here’s the answer: Kerry’s plan is better, even though you think he wouldn’t get along with anyone in your bowling league. (Memo to the Kerry Campaign, that would make an awesome slogan.)

Lloyd Dangle of the always funny Troubletown also has a cartoon about undecided voters this week.