Douche Music In Red Stockings

charles bronson the deuceI understand that Red Sox fandom can cloud the minds of many sane men and women, but it shouldn’t prevent anyone from seeing that Bronson Arroyo’s music is the shittiest thing to happen to baseball since the Devil Rays.

I haven’t heard any tracks off of his CD, nor do I intend to, but I’ve endured enough of Bronson’s awkward “jam sessions” on NESN’s pre and post-game shows to know that it’s crap. If he wasn’t on the most popular sports team in New England, every fat ass in Massachusetts would snatch that guitar from him and smash it like Bluto in Animal House. To claim anything else is shameless ass-kissing at its worst.

If I wanted to hear shitty covers of songs I don’t like, I’d hang out on any given quad in Boston.

The tone of this post would be completely different if Manny Ramirez was releasing a CD called “My Great Big Pile of Money Is Great for Fucking On.”