I came up with the phrase “God’s Goofballs” last week and instantly fell in love with it. I was confident I’d be able to make something hilarious out of it. Instead, I was only able to make mediocre God’s Goofballs-ade.
The Rapture is never going to happen. I wish it would. We’d finally be rid of a large portion of the world’s self-righteous assholes. Believing the Apocalypse is near is something morons have been doing for thousands of years, even before Christ came along.
The end of the world may very well happen, but its details won’t be anything like that cosplay nerd fantasy that’s the book of Revelation. It will be tragic for everyone, sinners and saints alike, and will most likely have been completely preventable.