I can stay indoors this morning and put together something worth your time, or I can slap together this post and ride my bike (It’s fixed, kinda.) instead. I chose the bike. But I still love you. Just not as much as I love falling down and getting bitten by mosquitoes.

I thought I posted this video before, but a quick search says I didn’t. My brain is full of lies!

Polysics – I My Me MineGogol Bordello – Wonderlust King

Brian Got a Boo-Boo

My Bike

After a couple weeks of being a shitty useless lump, I finally took the bike out to Borderland, my favorite place to ride in southeastern Massachusetts. I wasn’t in as bad shape as I thought I would be and was sailing along. Until a dick of a sapling slapped me in the face. I was on these elevated planks and it quickly threw me off balance.

Branch Small

The bike immediately fell of the planks, but thanks to momentum, I continued forward, sans bicycle. I escaped with just a minor cut and and some bruises that have yet to surface, but I fear my fork went kaput. A mile or so later it started making this horrendous clanging sound and oil started dribbling out of the stanchions.

I’m about to take it to the shop. Let’s hope Ol’ Bikey is fixable and I don’t need to buy a whole new fork.

I’m Lookin’ Ovah Heah!

I was procrastinating, as is my custom, and going through some of the home movies I digitized last year. I thought I’d share this clip from Christmas 1983, when I was four years old. The camcorder’s hooked up to the TV, which is what I’m looking at near the beginning of the video.

I can now say the word “helicopter” on the first attempt. Yay me!

UPDATE: Hey! I just remembered I have some more ephemera from 1983 on my computer.

Brian on the Toilet

Goodish News from Iraq

After I wrote the “good news pipe” line, I thought the rest of the comic would write itself. Sadly, that was not the case, and I had to hamfistedly come up with six more panels. Iraq is a stinky pile of poo that makes everyone with more than half a brain very sad.

Anyone who complains that support for the Iraq debacle is tanking because good news is going unreported is a dumb-shit piece of shit. That’s like the Red Sox fans who complain that their current swoon is caused by the CHB’s dour articles in The Globe.

Next Week: Something about laziness. I haven’t written it yet.

Important News!

Fudgie the Whale

Fudgie the Whale will be attending my birthday celebration at the end of next month! It took a lot of wrangling with his agent, but it looks like after 27 Fudgie-less birthdays, it’s finally going to happen.

No more blogging until Friday’s update. I’ve gots me a book to put together and a CWA video to edit.

21 Cent Book Bin

This is the comic I rushed before heading out to DC last week. I don’t have anything to add except that I still have my copy of “Flat Stanley” and its accompanying audio cassette.

Crave more Lincoln jokes? Then check out this old grainy video from Bob, of “and David” fame.

Last week I noticed Charles started the Big Fat Whale page on Wikipedia. Feel free to expand on it my legion of compu-nerds.

Next Week: Goodish News from Iraq


Simspons Avatar

Everyone knows what I look like as a Big Fat Whale cartoon, but what about as a Simpsons character? Now you know. If you’re bored too, make your own and post it in the comments. I know I’m a cog in the FOX machine for posting this, but screw it. Groening’s Life in Hell is the reason why Big Fat Whale exists.

I’m really digging the PR campaign for the movie, even though I have my doubts about how good it’s going to be. The past several seasons have been unable to remain cohesive for 22 minutes, so I’m skeptical about what they’re going to do for 90.

In a rare first-run coup, the Somerville Theater will be showing it opening weekend. Hopefully they’ll be serving Duff instead of Harpoon.

L’Enfant Was a Dum-Dum

I’m glad to be back from DC. Somehow that town has managed to surpass Boston in all the wrong categories: summer heat and humidity, traffic, and public transportation (How do the car-less bring glass things home from the store?).

Other than that, it was fun. Really. It turns out a lot of cartoonists I’ve heard about really do exist. And they’re all far nicer than myself, Senor Grumpypants.

Many thanks to August and Matt for the accommodations. And also thanks to Warren for exposing me to the hilarity of the Presidents mascots at Nationals games. Go Teddy, go!