Public Options Live

Public Options Live
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If you’re not familiar with John Carpenter’s They Live, this clip should light a fire under your ass to go see it right-fucking-now:

I’ve heard, seen, and written the words “public option” so much over the past few months, they’ve nearly lost all meaning. But you’d have to be pretty fucking dumb to think the federal government isn’t already shooting public options out of its ass for everything BUT health insurance.

But you know what? Private options are all over the goddamn-place too. Some are prohibitively expensive, but since selfish assholes deny the benefits of pooling resources to lower costs, there’s a private (and usually more expensive) option for nearly everything the government does.

Don’t like the public option for streets and sidewalks? You can build your fucking own on your own goddamn property!

Don’t like the quasi-public option of the United States Post Office? Go to UPS!

Don’t like the public option for putting out fires and saving your ass? Hire a big dude to follow you everywhere with a giant hose!

Don’t like cheap, affordable public transit? You can get a limo, Mr. Moneybags!

Don’t like your public water supply? Pay Coke or Pepsi to bottle someone else’s public water supply for you, you fucking moron!

Don’t like the US Military? Dick Cheney’s old mercenary company will gladly take your money to fuck some foreigners up!

Don’t like NASA being fucking awesome and sending dudes to the fucking moon for all of fucking mankind? Burt Rutan and Sir Richard Branson will send you on a sub-orbital, pussy-ass space flight for a hefty fee.

It goes on and on. Republicans/Libertarians argue that all of these things are privileges, not rights, and that they shouldn’t be taxed to give poor people access to them. They can take that position because they are terrible human beings.

However, I firmly believe blow jobs are a privilege. I will not support a public option that gives blow jobs to those who can’t earn them on their own. Coincidentally, that group is almost entirely made up of Republicans and Libertarians.

Tom Tomorrow, Kevin Moore, Jen Sorensen, Matt Bors, and all of my peers who take their alt-weekly cartoon orders from George Soros and ACORN have recently done excellent cartoons about our nation’s terrible health care.

Next Week: Surviving the Wilderness

7 thoughts on “Public Options Live”

  1. I got the “They Live” reference even before reading the blog post! aren’t you PROUD of me???

  2. THIS IS IT!

    The healthcare reform bill released by the House Of Representatives is an excellent bill as I understand it. It’s a bill with a strong, robust, government-run public option, and an intelligent, reasonable initial funding plan to cover almost all of the American people. It is carefully written, and thoughtfully constructed, informed, prudent and wise. This bill will save trillions of dollars, and millions of your lives. It is also now supported by the AMA.

    This is the type of bill that all Americans can feel good about. And this is the type of bill that has the potential to dramatically improve the quality of healthcare for all Americans. Rich, middle class and poor a like. Democrats, Republicans, Independents, and all other party affiliations. This bill has the potential to dramatically improve the quality of life of every American.

    The house healthcare bill should be viewed as the minimum GOLD STANDARD by which all other proposed healthcare legislation should be judged. All supporters of true high quality healthcare reform should now place all your support behind this healthcare reform bill released by the United States House Of Representatives, as the minimum Gold standard for healthcare reform in America.

    You should all now support this bill with all your might, and all of your unrelenting tenacity. This healthcare bill is a VERY, VERY GOOD! bill for all of the American people. Fight tooth, and nail for every bit of this bill if you have too. Be aggressive, creative, and relentless for this bill.

    From this time forward, go BIGGER and DEEPER with the American people every day until passage of healthcare reform with a robust, government-run public option.

    FIGHT!! like your life and the lives of your loved ones depends on it. BECAUSE IT DOES!

    It should also be noted that Ron Wyden’s “Free Choice Proposal” in the senate is a highly intriguing proposal and possibly a brilliant idea. And an Idea that should be strongly looked into as a way of increasing consumer choice, and consumer access to a government-run public option.



    God Bless You

    Jack Smith — Working Class

  3. Matt – Subliminal alien messages and vocabulary flashcards for toddlers are the only acceptable uses for excessive labeling.

    Melissa – Hooray! I can’t decide if the next movie reference should be “Road House” or “Toxic Avenger.”

    jacksmith – I didn’t read all of that. And I have a sneaking suspicion that you didn’t read the post.

  4. Forcing people into a government-run monopoly is *not* compassionate, and will *not* help the poor!

    Those of us like myself without health insurance will be better off with competition and choice, not with some health czar making decisions about the treatment we get, and our children and grandchildren going deeper into debt to pay for the outrageously inflated prices of lawyer-inflated and paperwork-inflated health care.

    Apologists for the euphemistically-named “public option” and other manifestations of big government don’t want to talk about the alienating nature of the system. The U.S. federal government is in essence a giant corporation. The people who run it are not noble and public-minded — this is a big, fat, glaring myth that we all should have seen through by now. The reality is they are no less greedy and self-serving than the people who run non-government corporations.

    U.S.A. Inc. has all kinds of blood and dirt on its hands, and it is so vast an enterprise that it does not even have internal accountability, let alone accountability to the people. Its agencies regularly *lose track of* billions of dollars! How ideologically blinded do you have to be not to see that giving more money and power to this organization is the height of folly???

  5. Yes, I see… a public option would force you to have government-run health care, just like Roe V. Wade forces women to have abortions.

    If only the public option could be optional. :'(

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