Grocery Prototypes

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Some  jokes about food, drink, and doo-doo water. A tenuous link to the news can be made with this one because of the Oklahoma state senator who wants to ban human fetuses in food, which kinda-sorta applies to my stem-cell Taco Bell gag, but I drew this before that happened. I just wanted to make a juvenile damaged sphincter joke, but some jagoff made it timely.

But yeah, don’t eat fetuses.

This is What Conservatives Give a Shit About?

I get tons of boring email. It comes with the territory. But it’s Friday night, I’m finally setting up a Netflix account of my own, enjoying a fine IPA, and all of a sudden, this professor storms into my inbox with long-winded righteous indignation!  I normally would ignore such blathery, but I blame the IPA. His email, in full:

Dear Mr McFadden,

Will you read a letter from a conservative art historian who teaches at [REDACTED] College?

Since early childhood I have been a fan of political cartoons, and love to see a point made cleverly with visual means, whether or not I agree with the politics. There are cartoonists of the left who make me laugh, even as I disagree with them, and vice versa.

But I think your lemonade stand bit this weekend in the Times fell flat, and in a way you didn’t intend. As you well know (to judge by the comments on your blog), conservative businessmen or Republican governors do not tyrannize lemonade stands. This is exclusively the province of petty soul-crushing bureaucrats, the bland mediocrities that Hannah Arendt described for us. If you want to scorn, mock, ridicule or otherwise lampoon us on the right — it should be vaguely related to something we actually do. In fact, since your cartoon appeared, your own Massachusetts gendarmes just shut down a 12-year old’s stand.

And here’s a litany of similar cases.

Anyway, the rest of the cartoon is fine but it struck me that that panel was dishonest, and the one thing that’s fatal to the political cartoonist is dishonesty. Vulgarity, obscenity, any of the seven deadly sins is perfectly fine in a cartoonist, but not dishonesty. I won’t bore you any more, but for your files I am attaching here an essay of mine on the subject that appeared in Commentary in 2003. It’s only the pdf of the galley; the title was “Cartooning, Right and Left.”

Somehow I have the feeling that I’m not the only one who’s taken you to task about lemonade.

politics aside, congrats on your posting to the Times,


And my well-thought-out reply:

Thanks for the essay, professor!

Somehow I have the feeling a passive aggressive somebody needs to look up the definition of tyranny. And “for my files”? Yeah, I went down to Big Fat Whale Special Collections right away with those op-eds and put them in an acid-free box…with my poop.

Hipster Fart Jokes

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The title says it all. My hipster-hatin’ is not as strong as it used to be, but they’re still fun to mock. However, since I was called a hipster by the New York Observer, maybe I am one and don’t even know it. As an experiment, I stuck myself in one of the panels to see how out of place I’d be, and uh, it’s a pretty good fit.

If you missed it over the weekend, here’s the link to my most recent NYT cartoon, which unfortunately has no farts in it.

Next: Healthy Home Tips

Palin’s Boston History

Famous stupid person Sarah Palin said a dumb thing about Paul Revere’s ride.

Evacuation Day is a real thing here in Boston, and it celebrates when the British left Boston, ending an eleven month siege. Obviously it’s more obscure than Paul Revere, and even those of normal intelligence wouldn’t know about it, but I’ll never let the facts get in the way of a good poop joke, for LIBERTY!

Awful Ailments

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Here’s some juvenile fun that probably won’t draw the Paultardian hordes into the comments section like yesterday’s Quickie did, unless they’re able to read all the way to the penultimate panel before goin’ Galt.

Don’t forget to buy stuff so I can afford shoes and keep my revolting man-toes to myself this summer.

Next Week: Truths About Time

Interpreting Mass Die-Offs

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A few weeks ago, everyone was freaking out over a bunch of dead blackbirds and other animals. Maybe if our bombs launched all those dead foreigners into space and they landed in the middle of an Arkansas NASCAR track, this country would fucking notice.

The animal die-offs are interesting in a “Weird News” kind of way. The brown foreigner die-offs make us sad and angry, (Or angrily defensive, in the case of chickenhawks.) so naturally we don’t like to think about them. But not thinking about them is why they’ve been going on for nearly a decade. In the same decade, Snooki became a bestselling novelist. That is interesting in a “Fucking Disgusting News” kind of way.

I don’t wish death on any person or non-delicious animal, except for starlings. Those fuckers are the Euro-trash of ornithology, with their disgusting greasy feathers.

Next Week: Valentines

Obama’s Concession Stand

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2010 has finally come to a merciful end. Sure, Obama was able to squeeze out a few nuggets of legislative progress, but it left the bowl of our democracy covered in skidmarks, and I’m pretty sure he intentionally upper-decked the economy. I’d say 2011 will be better, but optimism is for the young and stupid. Nothing is going to get done until 2013, once the 2012 election circus ends.

But maybe Sarah Palin will take a shit out of a hotel window and we can all laugh again.

Next Week: More Mid-Season Replacements