Senator Ted Stevens’s Crazy Theories

Ted Stevens
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I admit that this cartoon doesn’t really have anything to do with politics. I’m just using the Senate’s most cantankerous old codger as a vehicle to deliver some nonsense phrases that were clogging my notebook o’ chuckles.

Although Stevens is only marginally involved with the content of this cartoon, the guy is still a douche. His recent crazy streak has managed to destroy any goodwill I had towards the state of Alaska from watching Northern Exposure (before it got shitty) in my youth.

It’s still not up on their site, so here’s the full page comic I did for last week’s Phoenix.

Next Week: Some crappy jokes about inventions.

9 thoughts on “Senator Ted Stevens’s Crazy Theories”

  1. Personally, when I was little, I used to feel sorry for the tiny actors in my TV, because all they had to watch was me and my family. Poor things.

  2. Yeah, I shouldn’t have used trapped. I just thought they were really in there, ready to party in the bathroom. I also thought Sea Monkeys would look like the cartoons on the package.

  3. I went to high school with Ted Stevens’ daughter. I can’t say this is a totally dead on depiction of the fart, but I can say with some pirated authority that it’s pretty close. Everyone in the family has a head shaped like a lightbulb.

  4. Rachel – Since I’m assuming you went to high school in Alaska, that state is back in my good graces for your use of the phrase “head shaped like a lightbulb.”

    Blake – I’m not sure. A “Green Line is slow” joke is the local equivalent of a Lewinsky joke.

  5. No matter, it’s definitely the king of all “Green line is slow” jokes. I’d probably laugh if someone made a Lewinski joke anywhere near as good. Hmm, that could easily be interpreted as “I’m a doofus who laughs at anything,”

    So please don’t take that to mean I’m some yahoo who watches Mind of Mencia and collects Garfield books religiously.

  6. My Garfield collection is quite sizable. It abruptly ends in 1991, the year I discovered The Far Side.

    I hope you’re not all the way at the end of the B train. You might as well be in Worcester as far as public transportatio is concerned.

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