Geek Gadget Guide

Geek Gadget Guide
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I’m trying out a new time for when the blog auto-updates with the comic post. I’ll still upload the comic to the site on Thursday nights, but figure Friday morning in the US is a better time for it to pop up in peoples’ RSS readers. Besides, the West Coast and beyond have been enjoying BFW before bed on Thursdays for too long! The website clearly says “Updates Every Friday!” You guys were cheating.

But it’s an experiment that will have to wait a couple weeks. I’m leaving for a two-week road trip starting tomorrow and updates will depend entirely on when I can find the internet amongst the gators, Piggly Wigglies, and racists of the South. Man, oh man, I can’t wait to get away from this abusive asshole.

Next Week: More Recession Recipes

Bonus Timewaster: After posting the cartoon, Rockwell informed me of an online Oregon Trail emulator.

Mark Your Calendars NYC!

Usually you are nothing but that thing I take the Tappan Zee to avoid on my adventures further south, but not June 6th and 7th! I will be emerging from my New England hermit-hole to attend this year’s MoCCA Festival. The event goes from 11am-6pm each day, with admission at $10 for one day, or $15 for both.

I’ll be debuting the long-overdue Big Fat Whale book, “Fun Stuff for Dum-Dums.”

Fun Stuff for Dum-Dums

I’ll be tabling right next to fellow CWA‘ers Mikhaela Reid and Masheka Wood, and with the talented illustrator and arteest, Melissa J. Gibson.

And that’s just a tiny sliver of the exhibitors. Check the first link for a full exhibitor list, assuming they get around to posting one before the festival. If you’re a comic nerd in the area, you should come.

If you can’t make it, the book should be available here not long after I get back from NYC. But since I’m doing this one through Lulu, there won’t be too many chances to get a signed copy as cheap as at MoCCA.

My advance apologies for flogging the shit out of this book. But since the newspaper business, including the alt-weeklies, has taken a severe hit during this recession, I need to sell lots of copies of it to make up the difference. If I don’t, I’ll go from the delightfully cranky cartoonist you all know, to that asshole who spit in your order of fries in no time.


Tom the Dancing Bug’s Ruben Bolling took some COCKY SAUCE a couple weeks ago and went after Oprah, Ashton, and whoever-the-hell else I couldn’t give two shits about in order to rack up his Facebook Fan Count. I let it slide, because he is OLD, and society teaches us to respect our elders. We’re talking Helen Hunt OLD folks, not small potatoes old like Jennifer Aniston.

But then Jen Sorensen of Slowpoke threw down and challenged Bolling. A kerfuffle ensued, and now both of these far more talented and famous cartoonists have WAY more Facebook Fans than Big Fat Whale. This is terrible news for me, as I just commisioned a “PRINCESS OF THE INTERNET” tiara from my local Kay Jewelers.

FIX THIS PEOPLE! I really want to wear this tiara.

The Great Pandemic Panic & Flu Freakout

Pandemic Panic & Flu Freakout
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People went nuts for that flu shit last week, huh? I was pleasantly surprised by how quickly people quit freaking out, even if it means this cartoon is as stale as a white, sun-baked dog turd.

This is the second time I referenced 2 Girls, 1 Cup in the comic this year. It’s kinda hacky, I confess. But unless my internetting skills failed me, I believe it’s still the reigning champ of viral nastiness.

Matt’s Swine Flu cartoon points out that a more lethal killer lurks in our driveways, and we and the media couldn’t care less.

I’m too busy to write out a long-winded treatise on how the public and media poorly understand epidemiology. Instead, below the fold, here’s every video mentioned in this cartoon, except the nasty one. No one wants that. Continue reading The Great Pandemic Panic & Flu Freakout

The World at My Sphincter-tips

As part of a Twitter joke at the Globe’s expense, I made a link to Google News results for the word fart. Turns out farts are frequently in the news. I have since subscribed to the feed for that page. It is fascinating. I have also done the same for feces.

TANGENT: I don’t mean to be a feces populist, but if you spell it faeces, who you foolin’? No amount of fancy spelling is going to make anyone forget you’re talking about shitting. Just call it ass-daisies if you’re too delicate for shit.

As for the Globe, its situation is really not funny. It’s like a bizarro Seattle, where the PI is replaced with a paper from Boston, the bizarro-Seattle. Don’t believe me? Both are liberal, coastal cities, but Seattle’s Big Dig might not happen, and unlike Kurt Cobain, the members of Aerosmith didn’t commit suicide, which they should have, after their first album.